My son anticipates Halloween all year…the second Halloween is over (and sometimes even before it happens), he has next year’s costume planned. That’s how I am with the Oscars. Variety starts their Oscar coverage/predictions very early, before any movies are out, and I remember last year reading their picks of what films would be likely Oscar contenders shortly after the 2023 ceremony ended. I don’t know why I do this. It’s just fun!
So I spent all year being excited for the 2024 ceremony but then kept forgetting about it on Sunday because my son had a fever all weekend (turns out he has strep throat, which is apparently always running rampant through all elementary schools). But, surprise, I still enjoyed myself. I laughed, I cringed, I teared up, and at one point I gasped and put my hand over my face dramatically, as if anyone was in the room to observe me other than my dog. By this point you’ve read everything there is to know about the Oscars, so I’ll just share a few thoughts because I can’t stop myself.
-We let our son watch the beginning of the show before shuttling him off to an early bedtime (although a combination of sickness and daylight saving time was NOT on our side). He was amused but also confused by Jimmy Kimmel’s monologue. “Why is he saying this stuff to them?” he asked, and I realized that at seven he has no concept of “roasting.” And although I tried to explain the show to him before, he seemed to think that it was going to be just listing who won each category…as soon as the Best Supporting Actress category was announced, he said “Oh, now it’s starting!” I mean, no one would worry about the show running long if that’s how it worked.
-Speaking of which. I mostly avoided the internet during the broadcast because I know myself enough to know I always get annoyed by reading random people’s thoughts on Twitter, but I did check in on a couple of Substack chats for newsletters I pay for. I get that some people don’t care about the Oscars…okay, I actually don’t get it, I don’t understand it, I’ll never understand it, etc. But I guess I accept it. But I’ll never understand why the people who tune in and are presumably a little interested complain about the length of the show, or the monologue, or the goofy bits, or the speeches. That’s what I’m here for! Make the show last all night, I say! If I didn’t want that I’d just check out a list of the winners the next morning. I want surprises and awkward presenter banter and, most of all, a respected and beloved icon going rogue while announcing best picture. What’s the alternative? Everything is boring and professional? No thanks!
-I got emotional when Da’Vine Joy Randolph won. I love her. Mostly I love her relationship with Paul Giamatti (Giamommy…No One Asked readers know) and how he clearly thinks she’s amazing in the interviews they’ve done. It was sweet seeing him help her to the stage…maybe it’s the romance novelist in me, but I always LOVE it when one celebrity helps another celebrity walk to the stage. I don’t care who it is, you’d better leap up from the audience if you see a woman who is either a) of advanced age, b) in a big dress, or c) in high heels attempting to climb those steps. You think we want another Jennifer Lawrence situation? Well, yes, I do want maximum chaos, but I don’t actually want anyone to injure themselves.
-I loved every time they showed Robert DeNiro in the audience and he was just sitting there like, “Okay, let’s get this over with….” Perfect.
-At about 9 PM, my son snuck downstairs and told me he couldn’t sleep because it was actually only 8 (we explained Daylight Saving Time to him and now he’s using it against us), so he got to see John Mulaney’s monologue and the I’m Just Ken performance, which was great because that’s one of the only parts of Barbie I showed him (it’s not that I think the movie is inappropriate, it’s that I think he would get bored by the parts of the movie that aren’t Kens fighting or dancing). I truly adored this performance. What a joy to see something that’s actually fun. Also something I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned here, surprisingly, is that I have a lifelong obsession with Valerie Bertinelli that comes from a childhood spent watching One Day at a Time reruns (talk to me about my feelings on Schneider…talk to me about my feelings on the remake and the NEW Schneider…) and I didn’t care about seeing Slash but I DID care about seeing her son, Wolfie. Good for him. Good for Valerie. Someday I’ll write a post that really NO ONE Asked for all about my lifelong obsession with One Day at a Time, but not today.
-Seeing Jonathan Glazer win (for best International Film) and give such a good speech was amazing. The Zone of Interest was my personal best picture winner so I was happy to see it recognized.
-Hollis and I are mildly obsessed with composer Ludwig Goransson, so when he won I was like, “hey your boy’s on TV.” Once Hollis showed me a behind-the-scenes video of Ludwig working on the music for The Mandalorian, and I just found it so interesting. I love love love the music for that show because it’s intensely memorable, somehow sounding western while also kind of space-y. He’s worked on SUCH a wide variety of stuff. Our house is pro-Goransson! Good for him!
-When Cord Jefferson won for Best Adapted Screenplay it reminded me of one of my most clearly remembered Oscar wins, Diablo Cody for Juno. That animal print dress is gonna live in my mind forever!
-The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar winning prompted me to watch it with my son yesterday when he was home sick. He liked it but honestly, it was a lot of talking for a seven year old.
-When Emma Stone won instead of Lily Gladstone, I gasped. I haven’t even seen Poor Things so this isn’t a reflection of my thoughts on her performance, and I generally love her, but I was surprised! Maybe I shouldn’t have been…awards watchers know the tide had been turning in her direction. The last time I felt this way was when Brendan Fraser won instead of Austin Butler. No offense to Brendan Fraser, obviously. I think Hollis and I will try to watch that Lily Gladstone crime show that’s coming out next month, as long as it’s not too upsetting.
-I actually liked how they had the previous Oscar winners come out to announce the nominees. Hollis didn’t understand what was happening and when I told him Nicolas Cage was there he was like, “THAT guy’s never gonna win an Oscar.” I had to be like, “okay no, the point is that these are all Oscar winners and also Nicolas Cage has a long and varied career.” I guess he just thought of Nicolas Cage in the context of many of his recent-ish schlocky career choices, which I do find kind of offensive as a longtime Early Nicolas Cage fan (Valley Girl, Moonstruck, Peggy Sue Got Married, etc.). Frankly, I wished they’d done this AND clips! Make the ceremony five hours long, I dare you!
-I love looking back at the list of Best Picture winners and thinking about which stand the test of time and which are completely forgotten. Do you remember when The Artist won?? When’s the last time you heard anyone mention The Artist (in a non-dog context)? Oppenheimer feels like a movie that will last, as does Everything Everywhere All At Once. Parasite and Moonlight, yes. But CODA? You know I love that movie, but I wouldn’t say it had cultural impact. Green Book? Certainly not. Looking through the list of winners is always a fun exercise in remembering that the Oscars are mostly silly, and although it’s nice to think that they’re a celebration of the best of film, they’re ultimately voted on by human beings who are subject to “hype” and “buzz” and other things that have zero bearing on whether a film is good or enduringly culturally relevant or whatever.
That’s it for today! I’m behind on my next Alice post but it’s coming soon for paid subscribers. See you soon. xo
When John Mulaney went on the whole rant about how great Field of Dreams was and that it should win an Oscar but probably wouldn't be getting one that night, I immediately thought "that sounds like something Kerry would write" lol
my little theory is that you can see on Emma's face she didn't want to win because she knew it would come with backlash. i hate what this has turned into!
i am DEEPLY curious your thoughts on poor things (when you watch it!!)!